29 June 2010

A bundle of nerves

I took some time, as some of you have noted, to let my post about, and my memories of Viggo have some room to breathe. And during that time I have been grateful for your kind responses and the ways in which you have reached out to me. These past days have been less about blog as narrative arc and more about blog as community, and I am thankful for those who have surrounded me. Everyone should have that.

When we describe someone as "a bundle of nerves," we aren't being complimentary, are we? Because lordhavemercy that is me this week. My inability to sit still borders on the comical. I do some work, I play the piano, I walk, I run, I waste time on the computer, I daydream. Rinse and repeat. I am filled with equal parts excitement and dread, the upcoming move this weekend stirring in me thoughts about finality and change (thoughts that don't always manage to make sense to me, or represent any sort of cogent story). Even writing a short blog post feels like an impossible task: quick grab some random words out of the ether before they escape! Make sense of them later.


Is change always this rough? If you're a hyper-active guy with mild OCD and a fair amount of anxiety, I suppose. If you've imbued this weekend (or had it imbued for you by circumstance) by Much Portent and Meaning, then certainly. Stick with me: this too shall pass.


  1. “There is no sin punished more implacably by nature than the sin of resistance to change”

    - Anne Morrow Lindbergh

    ... which may or may not explain her adopting a 'selective-reality' regarding her marriage.

  2. May you be lifted into your *new* living situation by a weekend book-ended by Canada Day and our own Independence Day. Think of the freedom aspects but also remember all the things that won't be changing -- your friends, your job, your family, your health, (feel free to add to the list). I'll bet your foster parents will let you return for visits whenever you like.

  3. For me - when I can't control all aspects of a situation - it is upsetting and I get anxious so I can relate to your antsiness.

    I hope it is a smooth transition for you and the central air works.

    MD and I think about you a lot and we wish you all the best.

  4. It is true we are creatures of habit and now you're going to turn a habit inside out or something. My sympathies are with you. Perhaps a moment of comic relief would help the nerve bound. Each year I receive a few alumni magazines and each time I turn to the birth section hoping one or two parents will do the right thing. This summer I came across this gem: "a daughter, Paisleigh".

  5. Clearly, my type A personality overrides most of my daily life and thoughts...but I can share this observance I've made about change in my own life. I have found that the changes that feel most awkward, hard, scary or painful are those that reap the greatest satisfaction and reward. So, if you are anxious about the change ahead, I am confident it means, in the end, it will be a most satisfying change. Carry on...


As always, civility reigns, but cleverness trumps.

They shall be called my disciples.